Love does not seek its own. 1 Corinthians 13:5 NIV
In other words, love isn't selfish. In our culture, it's difficult not to get caught up in my own world and not expect everyone around me to be as concerned about "me" as I am, right? Even though I think I'm entitled to have as much happiness as possible, sometimes someone else's happiness should come before mine. Belive it or not, my desires just aren't as important as I think they are.
Ever since we were toddlers, we've been throwing fits when we don't get what we want. As adults, our "fits" don't look the same, though. As adults, our fits are much more sophisticated. They are demonstrated in the form of "the silent treatment", heavy sighs, slamming doors and manipulation. Isn't it interesting how we can be so forgiving of ourselves while having such high expectations for our mates?
It's critically important to the health of a marriage for each person to be deliberate about putting the other person's needs above your own. The authors of The Love Dare write, "The truth is, when you relinquish your rights for the sake of your mate, you get a chance to lose yourself to the greater purpose of marriage." We try to lose ourselves all the time with fantasy, alcohol, drugs, housework, our kids and our work. Why not try losing yourself in selflessness?
Do nothing from selfishness or empty conceit, but with humility of mind regard one another as more important than yourselves. Philippians 2:3 NIV
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